buywithme: (Shocked)
[personal profile] buywithme
Comrades, Consumers!

Frustrated by your workload as a warden? Annoyed by your inmates stubborn refusal to accept and embrace your moral directives? Sick of the ports, floods, and death tolling? Comrades, do not be disheartened! For Wardens in your position there are a wealth of options all available for a very reasonable price!

[He spreads his hands wide open, and gives one of those totally fake dazzling smiles that he's so good at.]

Our first, and most popular package deal is most appropriate for those of you still driven by the self interest of acquiring the promised reward of the Admiral! It comes with easy application, can be suited to even the most hectic of lifestyles, and many wardens have already adopted it into their program of inmate rehabilitation! It's simple:

Continue to act as though you're better than we are, while you simply stop caring! Stop responding! Ignore every problem as someone else's problem. Fellow warden having a breakdown? Ignore them! Inmate who you're not assigned to asks for help? Ignore them! Violent inmate publicly declares his intent to attack someone while roaming the halls looking for that person?

Ignore them all!

All this package costs is the well being and trust of the inmate population, and the mutual respect and consideration for each other that you're supposed to be teaching us, and Comrades, frankly I'm doing you a favor by taking those obstacles to a happier, calmer life off your hands!

But that's not all, for those of you so diametrically opposed to a life of responsibility that even this deal doesn't sound sufficient, The Factory does of course have an alternative! The price for this is slightly steeper, as it will impact upon your overall net earnings from your time on the Barge, but Brothers, Sisters, when it gets to the point where inmates are protecting each other and looking out for the wellfare of wardens not because they are reformed, but because you are not doing your jobs? Well, it's not as if you're likely to earn that deal on your own anyway! So we at the Factory would like to present an ongoing open offer to all wardens, application effective immediately:

[And the grin just drops away entirely, you get that CREEPY, COLD, DEAD EYED STARE HE USED TO TURN ON SAM WHEN HE WANTED TO BE LEFT ALONE]

Leave.

Date: 2010-10-08 01:03 am (UTC)
requiresssacrifice: Rex is amused (amused)
From: [personal profile] requiresssacrifice
Good to know you still have a way with words.

FLATTEREDDDDD <3

Date: 2010-10-08 01:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
Uh, thank you, Brother. I'm glad you found them effective.
From: [identity profile] equalsfive.livejournal.com
Comrade.

You have... a very good point, but my warden did help, comrade. As soon as I asked for it.

That's all I'm going to say, because otherwise, you're... kind of right. They spend a lot of attention on someone like that Borg Queen and entirely miss that you were getting hurt, not to mention the other things.

...I sort of contradicted myself there, comrade.

THEY HAVE EXCUSES :c

Date: 2010-10-08 01:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
Exactly. As soon as you asked for it.

You're her responsibility, she fixes you and she gets her end of the deal, everything else? She can just ignore.

They all can.

[Pause]

Sorry, Comrade. I do like Una, but this bothers me.
Edited Date: 2010-10-08 01:24 am (UTC)

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SPAM

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SPAM

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Re: SPAM

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He has to be nice to you fffffffffffffffffff

Date: 2010-10-08 01:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] yeehawkiller.livejournal.com
I dun know what you're sellin' but I'll take 20.

PREFECT IS CONFUSED

Date: 2010-10-08 01:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
I-- It's not really something you can buy more than one of. Besides, you're an inmate. You're not the target demographic.

[AND SCREW IT, HE GETS A HIT OF THE FLOOD TOO]

I would sell you it, if I could though, Brother.

1/2

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Date: 2010-10-08 01:11 am (UTC)

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Date: 2010-10-08 01:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
[Pause]

Not you, Sister.

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You're driving me to drink :|

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Date: 2010-10-08 01:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ichoosefight.livejournal.com
Who spat in your soup?

Date: 2010-10-08 01:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
I find it impressive that you can respond when you feel personally slighted, but not when people are being threatened.

You've just been kept busy with your Inmate, of course.

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Date: 2010-10-08 01:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] willkissawookie.livejournal.com
[No answer, but Leia's running off to check on Sark.]

Date: 2010-10-08 01:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
[WELL DONE LEIA]

Private:

Date: 2010-10-08 01:35 am (UTC)
acid_rayne: (Look - Left)
From: [personal profile] acid_rayne
That psycho gets free and still trying something on, you let me know.

I already warned him. Next time, he won't get any.

Private:

Date: 2010-10-08 01:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
I know. Suffice to say, Sister, this doesn't actually apply to you.

Date: 2010-10-08 01:41 am (UTC)
empirical_data: (grayscale)
From: [personal profile] empirical_data
I am going to withhold a larger statement as I am not particularly emotionally settled at the moment and it would not be particularly fair of me to speak out of anger especially as you have encountered a very traumatic situation, but I have helped other inmates than my own and I have taken my job very seriously. What is currently holding me to this location is my inmate, and I do not plan to betray his confidence. What you have not seen is the various efforts that I have been making to appeal to the Admiral for inmate rights, or the measures that many wardens do go to for their inmates in private discussions.

If you wish to impose a lump judgement, be informed that in many cases it is erroneous. If you wish to protest a particular warden or specific group, then please do so without a passively aggressive display.

Date: 2010-10-08 02:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
No, I have not seen any of your efforts, Comrade. If you have the satisfaction of knowing that I am wrong then I applaud you. If the descriptions here do not apply to you? Then feel free to ignore it.

However, the wardens on this ship outnumber the inmates, there have been no violent attacks recently, and yet we still receive no evidence that any of you even notice when people are in danger? You will be met with passive aggressive displays applied to you all.

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Date: 2010-10-08 01:41 am (UTC)
ext_987155: (i c what ur doing/sideways/oh clever)
From: [identity profile] imjustpretty.livejournal.com
Aren't you a charmer. Some of us are trying, alright? [Defensive warden is defensive, because he knows there's quite some truth to this. Although Ray does try. It's just that he's the kind of normal-person warden who gets killed when he tries. :|]

Boat full of sociopaths, stuff happens. We can't be everywhere.

((Ray's unaffected! Also, I'm off to bed, so no more tags till tomorrow. :| Sorry.))

Date: 2010-10-08 02:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
Only it's not a boat full of sociopaths, is it, Comrade? That's the problem, you're supposed to be better than us, and right now that's not the case.

More of you responded to my complaining, than you did to the man making death threats against me. You're just-- all more concerned for the damage to your ego's!

[By the end of this statement, Prefect sounds PRETTY GENUINELY UPSET. Sorry :c]

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Date: 2010-10-08 01:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] last-kodiak.livejournal.com
And if you were expected to take care of yourselves?

We are expected to be your warden. To guide, if I'm not mistaken...not hold your hand and spoon feed you.

Date: 2010-10-08 02:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
You tried to kill the small man who lives in the engine room. No offense, Comrade, but I'm not holding you as a moral point of inspiration.

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Date: 2010-10-08 02:14 am (UTC)
championoftime: (7 - mooooope)
From: [personal profile] championoftime
To be perfectly honest, despite the fact that I enjoy the situation is lively, I think that many have come to accept the death toll as a reasonable alternative to protection in both inmates and wardens. In any form of incarceration, the inmates always form alliances. But likewise, it was another inmate that was threatening your life, and the wardens that are being defended by their inmates have done something quite right in the past to deserve such loyalties.

I'm actually a bit envious. I would much rather my inmate were inclined to worry about me. One did save my life, but it isn't quite the same.

Date: 2010-10-08 02:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
You need a warden to restore you in order to qualify for the death toll. Mine is gone, and-- [sigh] I no longer believe that any others would have noticed.

[Pausing now though, because he doesn't want to be as depressed as he is right now, and you just gave him something else to poke at.]

Who's your inmate, Comrade?

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Date: 2010-10-08 02:46 am (UTC)
toldastory: (hands folded)
From: [personal profile] toldastory
Prefect, I would restore any and all inmates who came in and weren't restored by their wardens as I have in the past. I do hope you know that.

Date: 2010-10-08 02:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] doctor-scarf.livejournal.com
It sounds like someone needs a nice glass of tea and someone to talk to.

Date: 2010-10-08 03:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
It's all right, Comrade. O'Brien's going to give me some Gin.

[AND THERE'S NOTHING SAM CAN DO ABOUT IT. He's already on his way.]

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Date: 2010-10-08 02:52 am (UTC)
with_discipline: (If things were different)
From: [personal profile] with_discipline
Do you believe the barge would function better if all the wardens left?

Date: 2010-10-08 03:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
It's not as if you're irreplaceable.

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Date: 2010-10-08 03:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thatlibbychick.livejournal.com
Many of us try, Prefect. We try our very best, we're just...weak sometimes, too.

[She sounds like hell. Libby hasn't been feeling too happy recently and was shut up in her room.]

I've been...sick, and not as attentive as I should be, but I wish I could do something for you now.

I'm sorry, Libby :c

Date: 2010-10-08 04:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
Sister, you are the thirteenth warden to respond to me here.

On the post made by a man who openly declared his intention to harm me, two wardens responded, one of whom was offering to direct him towards the pub.

Maybe you have a good excuse. Maybe you all have good excuses, but... from my perspective, this just completely clarifies the priorities of the Wardens at large.

There's nothing you can do for me now, Comrade.

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Date: 2010-10-08 04:25 am (UTC)
empirical_data: (data's brain 2)
From: [personal profile] empirical_data
[And later, because Data is like this.]

I apologize for my previously rash reaction. I am on edge right now, and it was inappropriate given recent events you were subjected to. I hope Rayne makes you feel more secure in your situation.

Date: 2010-10-08 04:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
[Prefect is still totally on edge, so he's kind of a dick back to you. Sorry, Data.]

It's fine, Comrade.

Date: 2010-10-08 06:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] doctor-j-crane.livejournal.com
What an accurate summary of life on the barge. I'm quite impressed.

HE FEELS LIKE THE FLOOD IS TO BLAME FOR THIS.

Date: 2010-10-08 01:31 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
Uh, thank you. I think I hate the wardens right now.

Ironic, because it's not. XD

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BUT YOU KIND OF SCARE HIM

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CRANE, SCARY? NEVER.

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Date: 2010-10-08 08:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] warrenwhite.livejournal.com
Let me guess. Former telemarketer?

Date: 2010-10-08 01:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
I am a Prefect, it encompasses many functions.

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Date: 2010-10-08 12:39 pm (UTC)
una_persson: (Default)
From: [personal profile] una_persson
...

I'm sorry, Prefect.

Private

Date: 2010-10-08 01:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
It's all right. It's hardly your fault.

Date: 2010-10-09 10:32 am (UTC)
darknessb4me: (slouch of villainy)
From: [personal profile] darknessb4me
Ha!

[Arthas thinks you're funny! You know what else he thinks is funny? People with a limb nailed to the floor. They can only crawl in circles! It's pretty entertaining.]

I like you.

Date: 2010-10-09 05:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com
[Arthas, you get Prefect's lineface, because he doesn't forget things.]

You tried to strangle me. I haven't forgotten.

i remembered, he just didn't

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buywithme: (Default)
Prefect

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