102 - Written

[buywithme]

Comrades, I realise I'm not the first one to make this observation, but since apparently our journals have just opened up to a lot more people, does anybody know... I mean, has anyone spoken to anybody they knew once? Or... any gradua--

[Prefects writing suddenly changes dramatically, or, to be more specific, it stops abruptly, as someone else's handwriting starts across his page. The handwriting in question is somewhat wobbly, as though the person creating it can't see what they're doing, but formatically it's quite elegant, none the less.]

I invoke and move thee, O thou spirits in the present place, and being exalted above ye in the power of the assorted most high's, I say unto thee, Obey! In the name of Beralanesis, Baldachiensis, Paumachia, and Apologiae Sedes and of the mighty ones who govern spirits! Liachidae and ministers of the house of death and Chief prince of the seat of Apologiae in the Ninth Legion! I do invoke thee, and by invoking thee conjurt thee! And being exalted above ye in the power of the assorted most high's, I say unto thee, Obey! And Attend upon me!

I am he formed in the shape of the Christian god, forged in the mind of all heathen histories and knowledges mysterious, And being exalted above ye in the power of the assorted most high's, I compel thee to obey! I compel thee to arise before me!

[There's a brief pause, before the following is added]

Why does it never work? Stupid, stupid Crowley and his stupid incantations I only changed it a little, in places, there is no reason at all why it shouldn't work!

[Underneath this, in small letters, Prefect has responded:]

But I'm not a spirit...


[ooc: Sorry for spamming Prefect a bit, It's all a plan to coax out the lolbear :c]

Comments

[gotgreenmagic.livejournal.com]

....what the heck, Comrade?

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

That wasn't me!

It was totally this guy :c

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

Comrade? Whose hand it it which guides my planchette?

[notatdorsia.livejournal.com]

Hey Gorbachev, calm yourself with the text wall. My IBM doesn't have enough RAM to handle all of it.

DOUBLES GET! Um. I mean, that is a very fine icon, my friend.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Comrade, I assure you I would never willingly do anything that might interfere with your RAM! I didn't write that!

[onetoothbrush.livejournal.com]

Incantations, is it, my good man? Invocations, mysteries and magic, mm? Crowley is notoriously hard to replicate. Perhaps it would be better to try one of his contemporaries. Osman Spare, perhaps? Or maybe, my dear fellow, it is time to invest yourself in new growth. Why, perhaps it is simply time for development and progress from the old masters, my friend.

But would you do me a small favour? Just one tiny, itsy little favour? Mm? I only need some information. Tell me, how is it that your words have suddenly appeared on my own simple typewritten page?

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

I-- Comrade, I believe that somehow you've gotten access to what's usually an enclosed communication network. I'm afraid I don't know how, though.

[chainedtoacomet.livejournal.com]

I don't think it's fruitful to mess with the powers that be, or in this case the divine forces of the Garrison.

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

Oh, what would you know about it anyway? Go back to church!

[dr-wilson-md.livejournal.com]

This is an unreasonably stupid prank to pull when I have so much paperwork to do, House.

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

Thus spake he, inhabitant to the House of the bloodstained mare! If I pulled a prank on you, I promise you would recognize it as such within an instant!

[nzrocks.livejournal.com]

The posters have to be organised by Thursday, Greg. I don't have time for this jibber jabber over the wihi. What is going on over there?

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

I am attempting to commune with unknown spirits, but their meaning is elusive to me.

Also, I am not Greg.

[suckthehead.livejournal.com]

Aw man, you some kinda wizard? I mean, I didn't think magic existed outside of that David Copperfield "make-the-statue-of-liberty-disappear" shit, but then, I didn't think zombies existed, neither, but here they are, so I guess anything's possible and-- [STOP HIM HE WON'T STOP TALKING]

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

I am a student of the occult arts, yes.

[But Simon doesn't stop him talking, he's talking about Zombies, and Simon's interested in Zombies, you just keep right on going, Ellis!]

[lololbear.livejournal.com]

[All you hear is something breathing. Maybe a few ursine grunts...]

Voice on!

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Comrade?

[nzrocks.livejournal.com]

That's not a sheep.

[unbiasedchance.livejournal.com]

...

Right, who the hell took over Prefect's journal? That's not his handwriting.

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

It was I! Simon Alexander!

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

I don't know. Do you have any specific reason to suspect insane people of this crime?

[isanawesomelol.livejournal.com]

Knock knock.

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

Who's there?

[themostdashing.livejournal.com]

Fratello...?

Much has changed, no? The Pavi does not remember you invoking things.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Brother!

I'm not invoking anything, someone else was just writing in my journal.

[Pause while he manages to refrain from writing something like: I LOVE YOU :C]

How- how is your home?

[cyberlolcat.livejournal.com]

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

[nashrath.livejournal.com]

What the flying bitch is that?

...Satanism doesn't really work, you know. It's just angsty teenagers and people who were molested by priests.

[knownoguilt.livejournal.com]

Well then it's a good job this isn't Satanism, it's Thelema you petty ignorant .