102 - Written

[buywithme]

Comrades, I realise I'm not the first one to make this observation, but since apparently our journals have just opened up to a lot more people, does anybody know... I mean, has anyone spoken to anybody they knew once? Or... any gradua--

[Prefects writing suddenly changes dramatically, or, to be more specific, it stops abruptly, as someone else's handwriting starts across his page. The handwriting in question is somewhat wobbly, as though the person creating it can't see what they're doing, but formatically it's quite elegant, none the less.]

I invoke and move thee, O thou spirits in the present place, and being exalted above ye in the power of the assorted most high's, I say unto thee, Obey! In the name of Beralanesis, Baldachiensis, Paumachia, and Apologiae Sedes and of the mighty ones who govern spirits! Liachidae and ministers of the house of death and Chief prince of the seat of Apologiae in the Ninth Legion! I do invoke thee, and by invoking thee conjurt thee! And being exalted above ye in the power of the assorted most high's, I say unto thee, Obey! And Attend upon me!

I am he formed in the shape of the Christian god, forged in the mind of all heathen histories and knowledges mysterious, And being exalted above ye in the power of the assorted most high's, I compel thee to obey! I compel thee to arise before me!

[There's a brief pause, before the following is added]

Why does it never work? Stupid, stupid Crowley and his stupid incantations I only changed it a little, in places, there is no reason at all why it shouldn't work!

[Underneath this, in small letters, Prefect has responded:]

But I'm not a spirit...


[ooc: Sorry for spamming Prefect a bit, It's all a plan to coax out the lolbear :c]

Comments

[onetoothbrush.livejournal.com]

Why, that appears to be a worthy cause indeed. Mm? Or so it would seem. But things that seem may not always be, if you see what I mean, and so, might I ask a question, just another very small question? It's just, you seem like a friendly man, and I feel as if I can speak to you; I hope you don't find it rude. Curiosity is one of the many curses of our nature, after all. Mm? There are others, but curiosity stands out, don't you think?

But I have been distracted. Without further ado, just another small question. On which side of that reformation do you fall, my dear man?

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

[Silence as he just LISTENS TO YOU TALK.]

Comrade, you are really very exceptionally verbose!

[Another pause, as he decides to actually answer your question.]

I'm an inmate. My name is Prefect, I was an alpha plus assigned to oversee division B of the western central sales floor of the Factory, then I died, and now I'm an inmate here.

It's nice to meet you, Brother.

[onetoothbrush.livejournal.com]

My name is Jack, my dear Prefect, Jack Your Firm's Name Here. Perhaps I could be Jack Factory, if you wanted to advertise... But I'm getting ahead of myself again. It's a pleasure to meet you, simply a pleasure.

What does an alpha plus assigned to oversee division B of the western central sales floor do? And what could be so bad about being a salesman that you would end up imprisoned, mm?

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Jack Factory is one of the best names I've ever heard! But... unfortunately I suspect I presently lack the means to conduct any off barge business, so I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to employ that particular service from you, Comrade.

An alpha plus assigned to oversee division B of the western central sales floor, oversees division B of the western central sales floor!

[Pause]

Which is to say, uh, It was my responsibility to maintain the workforce up to the standards of the factory. Correct them when they began to malfunction, and to evaluate when they completely fail to fulfill their function.

I don't think what I did was bad enough to warrant being sent here either.

[onetoothbrush.livejournal.com]

That sounds completely reasonable, my dear Prefect! After all, what is a factory but the sum of its workers? A factory is a machine, and a machine is made up of tiny little parts, all working together, moving together, ticking together for a singular purpose. Why, a factory is an organism, each person a living cell. Prefect, if one single cell dies, rot can begin to spread. If only one cell dies, the whole organism is as good as dead! And if we, taking that example, using that as our building block, apply those principles wholly to your factory, well. It is clear that if one single person in your factory fails to complete their allotted task, if one single man fails to do his job, the whole factory is compromised. No, my dear Prefect, from what I see, your job was necessary. Necessary, yes, and, why, I would even call it noble.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

I know, right? That's what I have been trying to continually explain to my fellow inhabitants! What I did I did for the Factory and the Factory is stronger and kinder and more glorious than anything else on earth, and it needed me and I lived up to those needs and the fact that some people had to be removed from the labor pool is just unfortunate, Comrade, but there's nothing to be done for it! I was fulfilling my function!

[onetoothbrush.livejournal.com]

My dear Prefect, don't let them tell you that what you did was in any way wrong. It's completely natural; it's nothing but downsizing. As anyone in charge of a major organisation would know, after you gain a certain number of workers, downsizing may become necessary. If a man cannot complete his job, then he does not deserve it.

LOL PREFECT, SAM IS USED TO YOUR FAILURE

[bythe_books]

Oh, will the both of you just shut up?

[unbiasedchance.livejournal.com]

I'm with Sam on this-stop it.

[bythe_books]

God, it's only been two days, and I miss you.

[unbiasedchance.livejournal.com]

Thanks, I guess?