51

[buywithme]

Comrades! Consumers! The Factory would like to absolutely and categorically apologize for the complete failure of its staff to function in any reasonable capacity during the events of the week before last. Rest assured there were severe external influences disrupting the capabilities of its current outlet and staff body and the appropriate reprimands and restorative programs are currently being undertaken.

We would like to take this moment to reassure all our customers that this was an isolated incident and the recent decline in behavioral standards which the Factory requires of it's work force will definitely not be continuing. Despite the mitigating circumstances of this particular collapse of professionalism, we are ensuring that our staff attend a rigorous program of retraining and customer service specialization, to ensure the highest possible service for you! Our valiant and valued brothers and sisters, still living the immaculate dream of the blossoming consumer!

Comrades, let us never lose sight of the great glories of possession and obedience, above and beyond the frailty of our rotting bodies and fleeting allegiances, our broken hearts and our unfulfilled dreams, our dead parents and our meaningless names. Comrades, history is dead and the barge is its tomb. Nothing here has meaning, nothing here survives the ever strengthening vortex of it's function. Comrades, the phrase: "You can't take it with you when you go." no longer applies, because there is nowhere else to go! Forget your outdated notions of family and faith and freedom because all your abstract concept riches are back where you came from and you can never leave this place. Here, it doesn't matter how beautiful your wife is or how intelligent your beloved children are, or how fulfilling you find your job, because none of them exist anymore. Here? The winner is the man with the most stuff. Here, the only things left in the universe that will last, are possessions, and obedience.

Newcomers, welcome to the Barge.

This is an official Factory announcement, there are no golden shores.

Prefect
A+920164626P


[ooc: Annnnd we're back in action! Huzzah! Prefect has been doing some serious thinking and re-educating himself over the last week, this is his eventual response to the last flood!]

Comments

[unbiasedchance.livejournal.com]

Something's on your mind. Why else would you post this?

What are you thinking about? The last flood?

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Not at all Comrade! I'm just striving to achieve a professional, functioning balance between the teachings of the Factory and the difficulties of the Barge.

Is there anything I can help you with?

fake brother bonding, go!

[mimic-peter.livejournal.com]

So this is probably the wrong time to ask but do you want to get coffee or something sometime?

[petite-sleuth.livejournal.com]

First; you seem like a right ray of sunshine.

And second; whatcha selling?

[thatlibbychick.livejournal.com]

You're wrong. It still matters.

It always matters.

It was totally the wrong time to ask!

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Uh-

Comrade, at Present the Factory staff are endeavoring to sustain an optimum professional performance level and- and-

--and I just have to focus on working harder.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Sister, the beauty of uniformity, function, and The Factory will forever be a light in dark places.

I sell whatever I have, and whatever I'm able to aquire! What is it you need Comrade?

And, because the customer is always right! - Strikes readable with effort.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Of course it does Sister. It is all still of the utmost importance and neccesity.

As long as you're a Warden.

This won't stop him!

[mimic-peter.livejournal.com]

You don't have to work all the time, do you? Everyone needs to take a break.

He wouldn't be Peter if it did.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

I've had a very long break recently! It's time to rebuild my function. Comrade, if you need company then I can offer you some really quite riveting books on tape...

[mimic-peter.livejournal.com]

Um, I wouldn't really say that books on tape are the same thing as company.

What if I wanted to buy something from you?

[petite-sleuth.livejournal.com]

I feel mighty inspired now, Brother. Now what is the Factory?

I'm just testing the market right now. Like to be prepared, you know, just in case.

[muddershero.livejournal.com]

Do ya sell guns?

[unbiasedchance.livejournal.com]

We don't buy it

Not really. We're fine at the moment. However, if we need anything, we'll tell you.

1/2 - You're making him double take, Jayne!

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

2/2

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

The Factory would like to apologize in advance but due to current weapons restrictions within the ruling structures of the Barge it is impossible for us to provide stock in this area at this time, rest assured should these circumstances ever change, your name will be added to the many valued customers who have made similar inquiries.

Re: 2/2

[muddershero.livejournal.com]

Shiny. What do ya sell then?

[acid_rayne]

You ever received an actual wage?

Private

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

What would you like to buy off me Comrade? As always I will do everything within my power to provide fast, reliable, and completely confidential service!

Private - Now he's stalling so he can think of something.

[mimic-peter.livejournal.com]

Why do you feel like you have to work all the time?

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

The Factory is the great monument at the end of time, it is the arms of a mother and father who sustain and improve and teach us, it is vast, endless. It is the world we built on the foundations of need and guilt and covetousness and support and above all else Sister, work. It is all the jobs and all the products and all the functions that any of us really have, or any of us really need now, and we will serve it forever and ever until we are obsolete and discontinued. We are born, consume, fall silent, die.

I completely understand Sister. That's your consumerist prerogative.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

I sell whatever I have, and whatever I can aquire. Other than weapons: is there anything in particular you're looking for? Or are you just browsing?

Not buying it is probably the smart thing to do right now.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

All right Comrades. Please do come to me if there's anything I can get for you.

[muddershero.livejournal.com]

Browsing.

[buywithme.livejournal.com]

Alpha plusses live by the providence of the Factory. We don't need a wage.