buywithme: (Buy nice things off me!)
Prefect ([personal profile] buywithme) wrote2009-02-07 01:16 am

48 - Prefect is determined to have a reason to be happy

Comrades! Consumers! Despite beginning in a state of undue anguish, This month is a great, exciting, wonderful month! Indeed, it is in fact a month which has been set apart from all others! Comrades, join with me in celebration of February: International Grapefruit month!

Now! While traditionally this month long festival has been largely devoted towards the spreading of nutritional grapefruit information towards children and groups of people who may not be partaking of the recommended five daily portions of fruit, but do not let this deter you! For Comrades, what can we really take from the grapefruit? Nothing. It is a bitter tasting piece of fruit that might increase your life span. So what is our existence here? We're trapped, yes, we've suffered, yes, our personalities have been eroded... actually this isn't the best sales technique. It's not always easy, but Comrades, consumers, brothers and sisters we are alive! We are alive and we have all that we had before they came and all our brothers and sisters and Comrades are all still here and we all still love them and isn't it about time we showed them that?

Comrades, our tormentors are being punished, our killers are dead and although we are still here, we are here victorious! So! In place of the more traditional discussion of various nutritional values, I recommend we celebrate this fine month which has been set aside for grapefruit appreciation, with a celebration of everything the grapefruit stands for! A celebration of life, vitality, friendship, and less healthy, more delicious food!

Show friends that you care by sending them a "national grapefruit month" card!
Indulge in the traditional holiday fare of "national grapefruit month" with a delicious chocolate rice crispy cake!
Show your generosity in the ancient "exchanging of gifts" with your friends and associates!

And at some point there will of course be a huge end of National Grapefruit month gala, or something which is likely to involve music and cake!

Comrades, do not let this month of life affirming fruit appreciation slip through your fingers! Do not let it pass you bye along with so many distant memories, NO instead you must seize the month! Embrace it and it's noble traditions and spread its gentle message through the voices and means which I am selling for so little that I'm practically giving them away! So come my brothers! For he who chooses to celebrate this wonderful month is my brother! So come once more unto the breach Comrades, and buy with me today!

[ooc/disclaimer: Yes it is actually grapefruit month, no it does not have any traditions as far as I know (Prefect industriously made some up :D) and Prefect probably won't actually organize a gala. He just sort of got carried away :c]

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 02:55 am (UTC)(link)
I don't get it. Why the rice crispies if you're celebrating diet food?
bythe_books: (LOL.)

[personal profile] bythe_books 2009-02-07 03:00 am (UTC)(link)
So...

Hard up for a sale, Prefect?

The wind is sort of out of his sails now.

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
Because rice crispy cakes are tastier than diet food. I mean, I was thinking, grape fruits are good for you, but they taste bitter, and sometimes life is bitter and hard and difficult, but you keep on going anyway, so you should take some time to celebrate it with good things, like chocolate rice crispy cakes.

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:03 am (UTC)(link)
No.

I'm doing just fine.

DDD:

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:04 am (UTC)(link)
... [BOBBY'S PAUSE BEFORE RESPONDING INDICATES WEIRDED-OUTNESS]

So, you got any?
bythe_books: (brooding)

And now he kinda feels bad

[personal profile] bythe_books 2009-02-07 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
You're not letting a bit of competition get you down, are you?

NO COMMENT. Ralph is just eyerolling, and preparing future fat jokes. c:

[identity profile] fathersbludgeon.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:08 am (UTC)(link)

IT'S CALLED STRESS EATING, COCKSUCKER.

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:09 am (UTC)(link)

Prefect baked his own!

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:23 am (UTC)(link)
...Yes.

I'm selling them for... just sort of whatever anyone wants to give me. They're not really worth much, but it sets a poor precedent to give things away.

Despite his post indicating the EXACT OPPOSITE :C

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
No. I'm fine.
bythe_books: (nice hat)

Private - AND SAM HAS READ SAID POST

[personal profile] bythe_books 2009-02-07 03:28 am (UTC)(link)
No, you're not.

C'mon, pick yourself up. We're going to the pub.

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
Well. I got an empty picture frame. Don't think I'll be needing it much.

Private.

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:35 am (UTC)(link)
Okay.

You made him happy, Bobby :D

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:37 am (UTC)(link)
An empty picture frame is worth six rice crispy cakes. More if it's a big one.

Accidental happines go!

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:40 am (UTC)(link)
It ain't too big. But let's make it 8, huh?

<3

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:43 am (UTC)(link)
Well, bring it round, and I'll see what size it is. I might stretch to seven if it's standard, and eight to ten if it's bigger.

Re: <3

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:47 am (UTC)(link)
Look-- Prefect, is it?-- I'm a big guy. When you're usin' food as currancy, a little bit ain't gonna go a long way. You get what I'm sayin?

But hey, I'll bring it around. We can negotiate then.

...He couldn't contain it any longer. :c

[identity profile] fathersbludgeon.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:50 am (UTC)(link)
The Atkins, huh?

DD:

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
I'm dead. What's it matter now?

[identity profile] fathersbludgeon.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:53 am (UTC)(link)
I'd prefer if we didn't sink.

Prefect's just pleased to see you Ralph!

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:53 am (UTC)(link)

[identity profile] calzonewithlegs.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
Ain't the boat magic, or something?

MY ASS HE IS. RALPH CAN READ BELOW POSTS.

[identity profile] fathersbludgeon.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:55 am (UTC)(link)

A TRIP TO THE PUB =/= THE GLORY OF SHOE HANDS!

[identity profile] buywithme.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 03:57 am (UTC)(link)

[identity profile] fathersbludgeon.livejournal.com 2009-02-07 04:01 am (UTC)(link)
So what, you're just gonna sit back and inflate?

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