I got killed by someone who... believed in the same God I did. Had a different vision of it than me. It... I'd had enough of suffering for my God, comrade, I couldn't... I couldn't keep it up.
And I spent a while trying to keep it up. Trying to lie. Trying to pay lipservice in the hope I'd convince myself it was true, but it just made me feel worse.
Do you know the feeling when you've suffered for a higher power, blindly, over and over again, and you get nothing for it? It just feels like a repeated amount of punches in the face, no matter how hard you try? That's... that's about it right now.
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branchandroot
Re: Private
Date: 2011-03-28 12:40 am (UTC)I got killed by someone who... believed in the same God I did. Had a different vision of it than me. It... I'd had enough of suffering for my God, comrade, I couldn't... I couldn't keep it up.
And I spent a while trying to keep it up. Trying to lie. Trying to pay lipservice in the hope I'd convince myself it was true, but it just made me feel worse.
Do you know the feeling when you've suffered for a higher power, blindly, over and over again, and you get nothing for it? It just feels like a repeated amount of punches in the face, no matter how hard you try? That's... that's about it right now.