123 - Video ~SPECIALEST DAY OF THE YEAR~
Feb. 14th, 2011 03:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
buywithme[Click, and hey! It’s some video footage! Prefect is sitting in front of the camera, looking almost dementedly gleeful, and... what’s that piled high around him? But the cheap, tacky, Factory branded trappings of valentines day. Or at least, some of it is, some of it, on the other hand, is just stuff that Prefect has painted pink and is apparently hoping will blend in.
Pink hammer, pink ladle, pink ball, pink empty gin bottle, whatever, it’s all the colour of love.]
Comrades! Consumers!
Do not be disheartened by news of your recent demise and arrival upon an interdenominational prison ship which will strip away any semblance of your personality and confidence in the name of moral rehabilitation! And do not be curtailed from your pursuit of happiness by the recent murders, suicides and death threats being issued by your fellow inmates and/or wardens! Most importantly, do not be dismayed or distressed by those amongst you who would claim that Valentines day is a meaningless slew of commercial consumerist trash, because Comrades! [His face falls, suddenly completely deadpan and serious] That is the best thing about it.
[THEN SUDDENLY THE MANIC, RICTUS, FACTORY STYLE GRIN IS BACK]
Comrades, this Valentines day don’t sulk about your lack of popularity or mental and physical wellbeing! Don’t celebrate with a cynical lack of gift and card delivery, leaving those you admire with no physical token in recognician of their fantastic beauty! Don’t bemoan the commercialism of it all when you’re living in a society reduced to the crudest of bartering! But stand tall with me, in the glorious pink light of this most sacred of holidays, and buy with me!
Comrades, in this remarkable, one day only sale, I am offering a selection of immaculately produced, Factory standard greeting cards and romantic items, for the low low price of... [PAUSE. Apparently he hadn’t thought this far ahead in his sales pitch. Eventually, he raises his eyebrows and grins a little wider] ...almost anything! What’s that? You don’t think your significant other would appreciate any of these remarkable gifts? Well, don’t underestimate the versatility of our stores! The Facto-- Uh, the former Factory outlet point insists on the highest possible standards of service! Make our Valentines Day a happy one, by making your Valentines Day a happy one.
[And with that, he picks up the bright pink hammer, and turns it, so that the camera gets a nice clear shot of the nicely calligraphed “I Love You”, which Prefect has clearly written along the side of it. There is a long, long, pause. Then he realizes that maybe he shouldn’t be giving hammers to inmates, and quickly adds:]
Some items may be subject to restricted sales, no income from sales will actually go to the Factory, and no item or items actually guarantee a happy valentines day or positive reception from the recipient and a negative reception will not be accepted as grounds for a refund.
Pink hammer, pink ladle, pink ball, pink empty gin bottle, whatever, it’s all the colour of love.]
Comrades! Consumers!
Do not be disheartened by news of your recent demise and arrival upon an interdenominational prison ship which will strip away any semblance of your personality and confidence in the name of moral rehabilitation! And do not be curtailed from your pursuit of happiness by the recent murders, suicides and death threats being issued by your fellow inmates and/or wardens! Most importantly, do not be dismayed or distressed by those amongst you who would claim that Valentines day is a meaningless slew of commercial consumerist trash, because Comrades! [His face falls, suddenly completely deadpan and serious] That is the best thing about it.
[THEN SUDDENLY THE MANIC, RICTUS, FACTORY STYLE GRIN IS BACK]
Comrades, this Valentines day don’t sulk about your lack of popularity or mental and physical wellbeing! Don’t celebrate with a cynical lack of gift and card delivery, leaving those you admire with no physical token in recognician of their fantastic beauty! Don’t bemoan the commercialism of it all when you’re living in a society reduced to the crudest of bartering! But stand tall with me, in the glorious pink light of this most sacred of holidays, and buy with me!
Comrades, in this remarkable, one day only sale, I am offering a selection of immaculately produced, Factory standard greeting cards and romantic items, for the low low price of... [PAUSE. Apparently he hadn’t thought this far ahead in his sales pitch. Eventually, he raises his eyebrows and grins a little wider] ...almost anything! What’s that? You don’t think your significant other would appreciate any of these remarkable gifts? Well, don’t underestimate the versatility of our stores! The Facto-- Uh, the former Factory outlet point insists on the highest possible standards of service! Make our Valentines Day a happy one, by making your Valentines Day a happy one.
[And with that, he picks up the bright pink hammer, and turns it, so that the camera gets a nice clear shot of the nicely calligraphed “I Love You”, which Prefect has clearly written along the side of it. There is a long, long, pause. Then he realizes that maybe he shouldn’t be giving hammers to inmates, and quickly adds:]
Some items may be subject to restricted sales, no income from sales will actually go to the Factory, and no item or items actually guarantee a happy valentines day or positive reception from the recipient and a negative reception will not be accepted as grounds for a refund.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:34 pm (UTC)[Pause]
Would you like to buy a nice, romantic hammer for your friend?
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:43 pm (UTC)[wow. he's not bashing his head against a desk. He must have woken up.]
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:46 pm (UTC)[He holds up the hammer again]
Like this.
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:48 pm (UTC)[How could he possibly be expected not to fly into a consummerist party? Prefect reaches underneath his desk, and retrieves a bowl. There is a nice, pink heart painted on it.]
I got this for you.
[AKA: I FOUND THIS IN A BOX AND PAINTED A HEART ON IT, JUST LIKE I DID TO ALL THIS OTHER JUNK.]
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:51 pm (UTC)You can't be serious, comrade.
[He presses his very tired face into his palm. Oh, and he's wearing his shirt instead of overalls,]
I'm not taking your stupid consumerist present. No.
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 03:58 pm (UTC)[Don't say such cruel things in front of the bowl!]
It's not a consumerist present, I only give those on the anniversary of the first stock exchange... It is a Valentines Day gift, and I would like you to have it.
...he's a bit of a bastard. and hasn't slept much, okay?
Date: 2011-02-14 04:03 pm (UTC)No, no, Comrade, listen to me.
Firstly [He holds up one finger. He's tired and frustrated, okay?] I sincerely doubt you love me.
Secondly, [Holding up a second finger] even if you did, I wouldn't need a gift to prove it.
Thirdly, [Holding up a third finger] even if you were just giving something for the sake of it? I don't need a bowl.
Fourthly, [He holds up four (or is it five?) fingers] I don't do your consumerist nonsense for a reason.
[And he clicks off with a touch of a dramatic flourish.]
WHY YOU REJECT THE PRESENT THAT PREFECT ARBITRARILY SELECTED FOR YOU?
Date: 2011-02-14 04:11 pm (UTC)[Because, lol, if you did Prefect would literally never have cause to celebrate it!]
[You're gone... why would you leave? Prefect wanders off to the recesses of his room for a minute, there's the sound of some clinking and slooshing of paint... and a minute later, he comes back with a NEW PRESENT.]
[It's a bottle of Gin. With a pink heart painted on it. Prefect regards the camera, clearly hoping that this will change your tune, O'Brien.]
BECAUSE HE'S A JERK.
Date: 2011-02-14 04:14 pm (UTC)[However, he spots the gin and reconsiders his position.]
I'll accept that, comrade. On the condition you share it with me, and therefore, it is not some stupid gift in return for affection.
Lol wrong icon party!
Date: 2011-02-14 04:23 pm (UTC)[And now a HAPPY SMILE breaks out over his face!]
All right, Comrade! I would love to share it with you!
[AKA: WE ARE HAVING A MEANINGLESS VALENTINES CELEBRATION TOGETHER!]
Re: Lol wrong icon party!
Date: 2011-02-14 04:27 pm (UTC)[FACEPALM]
I didn't mean it like that, comrade. I just meant it was another bottle of gin, and we might as well share it.
[There's a slight, put out, pout over here, but he quickly returns to frowning.]
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 04:33 pm (UTC)No, I'll bite. How is a hammer going to be an appropriately romantic gift for my 'friend'?
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 04:52 pm (UTC)[voice]
Date: 2011-02-14 05:51 pm (UTC)ILU PREFECT
Date: 2011-02-14 06:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 06:28 pm (UTC)IT IS POSSIBLE THAT THIS IS A JOKE. A FUNNY PREFECT JOKE.
Date: 2011-02-14 07:16 pm (UTC)[Private]
Well, he is Sylar's warden, isn't he? It's a practical gift.
no subject
Date: 2011-02-14 07:22 pm (UTC)So, should I bring this over to your room now, Comrade? Or later?
[Yeah, he just didn't listen to anything you just said :c]
Private - ALL JOKES IMPLYING SYLAR SHOULD GET BEAT WITH A HAMMER ARE FUNNY TO SHEGO
Date: 2011-02-14 07:22 pm (UTC)