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Comrades! Con-- Ah, Friends!

[Video clicks on, and lo, it is Prefect! He's squared the camera up neatly, and is sitting at his desk. His clothes are comfortable businesswear, and he's... pretty evidently about to do some serious business talk at you]

I have been thinking about ways by which we could potentially improve the general understanding of concerns and needs within pairings and on board the barge! As we know, wardens here receive no specific training or direction in terms of how to assist their inmates, and while this has allowed each inmate to have their own individual needs catered too, it has also resulted in wardens often being ill equipped to respond to the needs of their inmates, or unable to identify common mistakes or problems which are effecting their inmates!

[He's slowly becoming a little more gestural and excited as he speaks, and there's a kind of forceful earnestness in what he's saying.]

These errors are not made out of malice, but none the less their impact on inmates can hamper, or even reverse the personal progress and improvement for which we are striving here, and I believe that they can be drastically reduced with a more organized approach to the sharing of common problems, experiences, and expertise! [The gestures are getting bigger, slightly more jerk-y and rhythmic, and his enthusiasm is just still GROWING.]

Please find attached a short anonymous survey requesting insight into people's experiences and opinions on their progress here, and their perceptions of the mechanics of the Barge. I mean to collect, collate, and publish the responses, in an attempt to identify regularly occurring problems and trends within the Barge's population, so that I can compile them into a document to assist newly arriving wardens and inmates. Perhaps we will eventually be able to develop an effective induction to those working here, for the benefit of all!

So Comrades! Brothers and Sisters! [He's getting downright bombastic at this point.] Please reject the hypothesis that struggling wardens are lacking in commitment or in the desire to help their inmates! Reject the idea that inmates who do not improve on the barge are deliberately resisting progress! We live within a flawed system which we have a duty to endeavor to improve! Embrace the healing power of standardized testing and anonymous data collection! Redemption through correlation! Let our standards be outstanding!

[He gives a wide, joyful little grin, then quickly adds in a hushed deadpan:]

All responses will remain entirely anonymous for the protection of respondents and their pairings, and any details which could compromise the anonymity of participants will be edited out or remain unpublished. If you have a specific concern with your warden or inmate which you require direct assistance or a direct response too please feel free to refer to the suggestion and/or complaint box and I will endeavor to otherwise meet your needs!

[And with that, he smiles again (bright as a malfunctioning floodlamp) and signs off.]



How long have you been on the Barge?

3 Months or less

3 - 6 Months

6 - 12 Months

1 - 2 Years

Over 2 Years

What do you believe the purpose of the Barge is?

How long have you been in your current pairing?

3 Months or less

3 - 6 Months

6 - 12 Months

1 - 2 Years

Over 2 Years

How many pairings have you been in on your time on the Barge?

If a pairing fails, who is usually to blame?

The Warden

The Inmate

The Admiral

All of the above

What do you believe were the causes for your former pairing or pairings being dissolved?

Have you experienced a problem with your warden or inmate which you consider to have been insurmountable? If yes, please describe it in as much detail you are comfortable with.

What do you feel has hindered your progress most within a pairing?

What is the most helpful or successful thing which has occurred within a pairing for you?

Do you feel that you have ever been partially or fully responsible for the failure of a pairing you've been in?

How do you perceive Inmates in general?

How do you perceive Wardens in general?

How do you believe Wardens and Inmates generally perceive each other?

Do you believe you have ever been, either partially or fully responsible for the failing of a pairing? If the answer is yes, what do you feel you did wrong?
[If you have ever deliberately sabotaged a pairing please feel free to discuss this as well.]

What is the one thing with which you struggle the most in your pairing?

Is there any advice that you would like to give to wardens/inmates in general, for how to avoid mistakes which either you have made, or which have affected you while on the Barge?

Please feel free to add any additional notes or comments.

[Subsection A]

When you first arrived on the barge, do you believe that you were either a bad person, or a person in need of some kind of intercession into your life?

How much progress do you feel you've made towards becoming a better, or worse, person?
[This question does not refer to perceived proximity to graduation, but your personal evaluation of your own ethical qualities.]

To what do you attribute this progress?

Your warden

Floods and breaches

General barge environment


Wardens who you are not assigned too

Influences from other inmates

Influence from both other wardens and inmates

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October 2013


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